Tuesday, May 26, 2009

The following is an account of our wonderful journey to Hope from October 2005-March 2009

October 2005 – How It All Started

I attended my first “judgment house” at our local church. I knew at that moment that I had a purpose on this Earth and that Jesus did indeed love me. Soon after this life changing experience by God, I was listening to K- Love, which is a local Christian radio station that broadcasts nationwide. It discussed the miracle of adoption. That day, as I entered my classroom, I got on my computer and searched the adoption agency that was advertised on the radio station. I soon confided in Paul the feelings I was having regarding helping a child in need of a home, a mommy, and a daddy. We searched for a local seminar on the topic of international adoption and, ironically, found one that happened to be hosted by our former church.

So it began, after much prayer we were accepted by Children’s Hope International to be prospective adoptive parents to a little girl in China. We began what they call the paper chase process of collecting and putting together our dossier. We worked diligently gathering documents, writing reports, seeking medical appointments, etc to deliver to China. Thus began the wait…..One thing we knew for sure was that her name would be Hope.

July 14, 2006 – LID

We were successfully logged in to China Center for Adoption Affairs with a LID of July 14, 2006. The wait time at that time was 15 months…then 20 months…then 24 months…then 30 months…then 32 months…

During the wait, which I must say we were very patient, two of our church families received their children, and it was sight of true love. It became very apparent that a love was growing in my heart for a child that I didn’t know….or so I thought. Often times during the wait, our family would comment that they thought and believed that Hope was already born and alive. We prayed for her daily and thought of life with her and for some reason God was delaying our meeting. But little did I know that our meeting had already occurred in our heart.

Many times our agency would display “waiting children” on their web site. These were children with special needs. I knew, as a Special Ed Director that there were certain disabilities that I would take on in my personal life. I would look through the children periodically and pray for the Holy Spirit to prompt me if there were any children that we should consider as ours. As the months went by, our agency experienced an issue with Hague compliance, which prevented us from receiving any waiting children to view. So the thought of a waiting child disappeared from my mind for several months.

Our agency received their Hague accreditation once again and began displaying the waiting children. Numerous emails went out to all of Children’s Hope families encouraging them to view the children. They encouraged us to complete paperwork so that they could match us with specific children. I printed the application and the instructions to become a part of this “waiting child” list, but never completed it to turn it in. I thought, “Well, maybe I was being impatient.”, but both Paul and I were concerned as the time went by and as our own children grew, that we were becoming too old for diapers, formula, cribs, crawling, and so forth. The age gap between the children was becoming a concern for both of us.

March 22, 2009 – A Week of Prayer

The week of the 22nd, I committed to praying every morning at 5:30am to bring Hope home soon. I prayed that God would speed the process up and we get her quickly. I usually watch Adoption Stories on TLC at 5:30 every morning and decided to leave the TV off that week and pray for Hope. I did this Monday through Friday.

March 29, 2009 – My First Look at Hope

After a week of focused prayer, I accessed the Children’s Hope web site. It was a Sunday afternoon and sort of a lazy day for all of us. I scrolled down the page of children who were defined as the “harder to place children”, again praying for the Holy Spirit to prompt me. And there she was, the very last child on the page. She had pigtails and a cute face. Beside her name it read Deaf. I immediately clicked on her information and read her story. Her caretakers wrote a very touching description of her. If was obvious that she was loved by them. I began reading her information all the while something was fluttering in my heart. Then I read, “Her large eyes are filled with hope”. The description was beautiful and I immediately called Paul down to see her. I couldn’t help myself so I submitted a request for more information. At that point, I thought someone else had already requested her information and there was little chance I would have an opportunity to review her.

A phone call came in shortly after from my friend Kim Wilhelmson. I told her about the little girl and the quote about hope. Chills went up her spine and she screamed “you found her”. “That’s her Lee Ann!!!” I began to get excited but was still very guarded. The rest of the day was a normal Sunday lazy day. I did not get back on to check my emails for the rest of the evening because I knew that Children’s Hope did not work on Sundays. I continued to think about her and looked at her a couple more times that day. I didn’t call my family because a part of me was fearful of their reaction. Although we had family members who were deaf and I was a sped director, I still thought I may have been out of my mind to think we could meet her needs.

March 30, 2009 – She’s Still Available

The next morning at 6:00am I checked my email and much to my surprise, the agency emailed me on Sunday just two hours after my request for review. I had no idea that they monitored the children on the weekends. The email stated that she was still available. I read the paperwork that morning, and again, something was happening in my heart. I couldn’t explain the way I felt when I looked at her picture. She looked like Hope!! As crazy as it sounded. I read through her paperwork and her name which is Guimei means the hope for a happy life! Excitement was filling my heart. So I decided to pick up the phone and tell my sister about this little girl who was labeled as Deaf-Dumb. Much to my surprise, my sister sounded tender and curious about this little girl. She moved to her computer and looked at her immediately. We discussed a few things about children who are deaf. But something was moving in her heart as well. Something we couldn’t explain nor reveal with this phone call.

I asked her to call my mom and let her know that we were reviewing a “waiting child”. I was afraid of the rejection and thought I would be told by someone that I was just being impatient and that I needed to wait on a healthy baby. I was still calm because I thought I had time to review the paperwork since I requested the information and it was my understanding that only one person could review the information at a time. There was a sense of peace that enveloped me during this time. Something only God could give me. My sister called me back shortly after she spoke to Mom with elation and said that I missed out on something very special with my mom. Mom knew immediately that this little girl was ours….WOW…..I am getting a little more anxious about this little girl. God seemed to be working and confirming through members of our family. I called my mom and I requested prayer and her words to me were, “My prayers aren’t whether you adopt her, it’s to get her home quickly”!!! We cried together. But I knew that I could not be overcome by emotion…that I needed to keep a level head and get a game plan as to what the next step would be.

I called Paul and told him about her. I read through the paperwork and told him to pray and that I was feeling overwhelming heart felt feelings. The next 36 hours were a blur for me. I decided to call the agency and asked how much time I had to review her paperwork. I thought I had about a week but wasn’t sure so just wanted to double check. In the meantime, my sister was making phone calls in her hospital to get physicians to review her paperwork. Excitement was beginning to consume me. She looked like Hope to me. Could it be? Could it be that she is four years old and waiting on us to find her? Could it be that God had to prepare our hearts to melt when we saw her? Could it be that all this time, she was alive? Could it be that our family experienced one disability in our lifetime and this happens to be the disability that she has? All of these questions but no answers………yet.

Christina answered the phone at the agency and told me that Guimei was actually on a shared list with multiple agencies! UUUHHHOOO. Fear consumed me….She was mine after all at least that is what my heart was feeling. Others could be praying that she be a part of their family. She said that I would have to “lock her in”, which meant I had 48 hours to determine if she was a good fit for us and we were a good fit for her. If we haven’t decided in 48 hours, she would be lost forever. Our agency would never be able to place her. I called Paul immediately and told him that these feelings were strong enough that I think we should put a lock on her and see what happens. So a couple hours later, I called Christina back and told her to lock her in. As I told Christina this, I could hear someone in the background squealing. Christina told this person that the “Laune’s want to lock her in”. After we locked her in, it ultimately meant that she was ours if we chose her. Once we were successfully locked, Christina proceeded to tell me what the squealing was all about. Rebecca, which is who I have always dealt with at the agency, told me that on Friday, March 27, 2009, she saw this child on the CCAA website. The agency was inundated with paperwork for all the families searching for waiting children. Paperwork was piled high and the social workers had no time to scan the CCAA website to upload children to our agency site. However, Rebecca quickly scanned the CCAA website toward the end of the day and found Guimei…she was beautiful and “something” told Rebecca that she just had to get this child uploaded before the weekend for adoptive families to see her. This was the only child she had time to upload right before she left to go home for the day on Friday. Could this be God? Still so much to do and so many questions!!!! Only 48 hours to determine this little girl’s fate.

The 48 Hours That Changed Our Lives Forever

I called my pediatrician and she was able to “work” me in at 3:45 the next day. Okay that’s a start. I was able to get in touch with an interpreting company through several phone calls and they were able to determine that I needed an American to proofread both china and English documents to make sure the interpretation was accurate and there was no missing text. Much to my surprise, she was able to get someone immediately for a fraction of the price. So that was put in motion. Meanwhile, my sister had gotten in touch with a neonatologist, an audiologist, and another pediatrician. She had scheduled to hand deliver the documents to the audiologist and the neonatologist and was able to get their feedback immediately. Life is spinning faster and faster. Could it be…that this is our daughter, the girl that God had planned all along. Has He just been preparing our hearts all along? Monday evening March 30th, I decided to text several people about the happenings and requested prayer from many friends and family. I sent a text out that read, “Please pray for Paul and I. We are looking at adopting a little girl who is four and deaf. I can’t explain it now, but what I do know is that when God speaks, we are called to obey…..pray pray pray.” That began a whirlwind of phone conversations. Soon many people were praying for us to make an informed decision about Guimei.

In the meantime, my mother had an eerie sense of peace and calmness. She knew that this was Hope. The moment my mom and dad laid eyes on her picture and read her information, they began to cry. God was working and confirming through them. My sister was in high gear making sure she connected with doctors and also had people praying. She also had an overwhelming sense of peace and calmness. I called Paul off and on throughout the day. He was overwhelmed by the response delivered from family and just took everything in stride. He knew that I have had intuitions in the past and he trusted those intuitions as being a presence of the Holy Spirit. Monday night came and Paul and I studied her pictures and reviewed her paperwork. We were elated that this might be the moment we met her. She looked like Hope.

Paul decided to call his parents on Monday night about this little girl. We were both frightened at the response just like we were from my mom and dad. Much to our surprise, they were calm and peaceful as well. WOW! God is using our family to confirm something I had already confirmed in my heart. They were very supportive and they prayed for us. Paul Sr. told us she looked like a little Laune. He also shared a story with me that touched my heart and we both got very emotional on the phone together. He told me a story about an old friend who once told him he shouldn’t marry Sue because she has all those health issues…he told him that she was going to cost him lots of money and heart ache. She may not live and if she does, they’d be broke because of medical expenses. Now 40 years later, there they are two happily married people! That was an analogy to my Hope! I couldn’t miss out on a lifetime of love for my daughter.

100% Assurances for God

The nighttime fell on March 30th. We prayed with our kids, who were amazingly supportive also. I woke up at 11:30pm in a panic and woke Paul up and told him that we can’t adopt her and that we shouldn’t be adopting period. I wanted out of the adoption process. I was so fearful and scared and terribly anxious. I decided to get up and go to the windows in the living room and stared up at the sky and prayed with all my heart that God give me comfort and peace to get a good night’s sleep because I knew I needed to be clear headed the next 24 hours to make an informed decision. I told God that I couldn’t do this with 90% assurance…I asked for 100% assurance that this was His will and this was the child He planted in my heart in 2005. I went back to sleep and awoke refreshed. For some reason I focused on her education the morning of the 31st. In my mind I was thinking we lived too far out to give her the resources she would need. I was sad. I felt that we weren’t the right fit for her. Then my pastor called at 7:30 in the morning. Pastor Jeff asked if he could pray for me as I obviously was experiencing a demonic attack. The moment after he called and we prayed, the doubts disappeared. I experienced that 100% assurance that I had asked for earlier! Then, some time in the morning before I went to work, it hit me that this decision has very little to do with education. This was a heartfelt decision that required a lifetime and commitment of love for an orphan who I began to call my own. It also occurred to me that I have always pushed for inclusion for children with special needs so why did I feel that I couldn’t serve her needs in my district? She needed her regular hearing peers more than ever. That was a revelation!! It put my mind at ease and I was able to separate the education piece from what I was feeling about a girl I would soon call my daughter!!!

March 31, 2009

Tuesday, March 31st was a wonderful day. I contacted several people including one who has already adopted a child who is deaf from China, another China adoptive parent, and many friends and family who were very supportive and understanding. My sister feverishly drove to doctors’ offices confirming that the paperwork medically looked okay other than the red blood count, which showed anemia. I went to my pediatrician who spent time with us and discussed the course of action that we would take with Hope as soon as she arrived in America. All of the other doctors gave words of encouragement and felt the desire to follow this case which obviously meant that Hope was touching the lives of everyone involved in this process. Paul and I were getting more and more excited. Paul focused on her pictures and just kept saying that this was Hope. In the meantime, I received information from the interpreter and fortunately, there were no discrepancies between the China and English text. The interpreter then shared a story about herself being an adoptive mother and she thanked me for allowing her to be a small part in this miraculous process. Our good friends, Scott and Cindy were wonderfully supportive as they know the experience of adoption, and they also know that when God speaks, He speaks loudly and clearly. They reminded me of the scripture in Philippians 4, 6-8, which says “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of god, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable-if anything is excellent or praiseworthy-think about such things.”

This verse will be my verse for the wait!!! So many amazing people all feeling the call that God has bestowed upon us!! Could it be? Was God giving us Hope? Was the timing perfect for Him to introduce us in our hearts? That evening, the evening of the China meeting, we introduced her to the China mission team. It was an emotional meeting. We cried and prayed together! I knew at that moment, she was ours. The hours were winding down and it was closing in on the time I needed to make the call to the agency with my decision.


April 1, 2009 – We Want Her!

The first thing Wednesday morning, I called Children’s Hope International and told them we would be honored to be her parents if China would allow us. We were so excited. The kids were ready to take the bull by the horns and learn sign language! They were proud to call her their sister! God called and we obeyed! God is an awesome God and takes care of the orphans. He has brought hearts from miles and miles away together to form a bond long before He has introduced us to each other. That is the miraculous process of adoption. A biological baby grows in your womb, thus creating that loving bond right away. An adopted baby grows in your heart, thus creating that loving bond right away. I can now say that God has blessed us with a beautiful child who longs to be loved and nurtured by a mommy and daddy just like He had intended. God is taking us clear around the world to bring a little girl home to a family who will give her the world and share with her the good news of Jesus!!! The adventure has only begun!!